Stories / Must Love Peanuts

John was a lonely man. He didn’t have a problem meeting ladies but he could never find the right one. Living in a small town didn’t help his chances much either. He was currently on a date with Karen the Dentists daughter. She wasn’t the prettiest of girls but he was running out of options. He thought the date was going well so far, a nice movie, a nice dinner at a fancy restaurant. She hadn’t mentioned peanuts to the waiter, could that be a sign? He wasn’t sure, maybe she’d been here before and the waiter already knew. It didn’t matter he told himself, she had to be the one. They were just pulling up to her house when the nerves started. He was always nervous at this part and it never got easier. As he pulled up in front of her house he made a show of pulling the parking brake and popped a few in his mouth. He had become an expert of chewing fast so that his female companions wouldn’t notice. They both got out after he turned the engine off and he walked her to her front door. It was a rather cold and windy night, never a good sign. As they reached her door he leaned in to give her a quick kiss like he’d down with so many girls before. She was definitely one of the nervous ones but didn’t resist. After a short kiss he pulled back to watch her. She seemed fine at first but slowly the telltale signs started appearing. He sighed and helped her back to the car. She seemed to get a bit restless after they drove out of the town but wasn’t in any condition to do much. He drove her out to his father’s old cabin and put her in with the others.

He lay awake in bed that night, lamenting the day’s adventures. She had been a failure just like all the ones before her. He knew he could never give up peanuts, they were his first love. He could still remember those long nights eating peanuts with his father. How he’d said that any girl who loved peanuts was the girl for him. Why did he have to be born into a peanut loving family in a peanut allergic town? He remembered his mother eating peanuts with them too, at least until that night she had forgot to take her pills. His father was very disappointed that night. She had been lying to him all this time saying she wasn’t allergic to peanuts all while taking anti-allergy pills. His dad was never the same after she had died; he always told him “You have to do better”. He owed it to his father to find a girl who wasn’t allergic to peanuts naturally. He couldn’t leave the town either, that would be cheating. He finally fell asleep counting the girls who were left in the town... 24... 25...

His love life hadn’t spontaneously got better by the next morning. He woke up late and went out to try and find another possible candidate. He’d gone through most of the women in this small town. The few he hadn’t tested had no interest in him and he wasn’t willing to push them. After a day of little success he was sitting in the gas station restaurant when a new girl caught his eye. She wasn’t from the town but didn’t seem to be passing through either. She was sitting at the counter and seemed to be surveying the patrons. He got up and walked over to her. She seemed to smile as he walked up and he took his chance and said hello. She didn’t run away or scream in terror which was always a good sign. She seemed calm and said hello in return. They then got into a little light conversation; she was apparently from a newspaper in one of the nearby cities doing an article on a string of disappearances in town. He offered to show her around town and introduce some of the places. She accepted and they left for the tour.

After a couple of days of casual meetings he asked her out to dinner. He had grown too really like her and was growing nervous about the date. She was a city girl and much more sophisticated than a lot of the girls he had been going out with lately. He imagined that his father would have liked her; he was always telling him that he needed a smart girl. After a nice steak dinner he started the familiar stunt of driving the lady home. He did his usual brake stunt and ate his handful of peanuts. He had low hopes for this but told himself that she was different. She was from out of town and wouldn’t have this town’s particular allergy. He walked her to the door and kissed her like he had kissed so many girls before her. His heart sank as she looked slightly paler when he withdraws. No no no damn damn damn, but wait yes she was fine. She didn’t have any spots or swelling or anything. She looked at him and said “I normally don’t move that fast but I happen to love peanuts”. His heart jumped at this news, she wasn’t allergic. He had tried to imagine this moment but it had surpasses all his dreams. Then he heard the sirens.

There were dozens of them and flashing lights from all around. Police cars were clogging up the street and all seemed to be converging on him. What was going on? What were they doing? The local sheriff got out of his car near the front of the pile and walked towards him gun drawn. “SIR” he yelled, “You are under arrest for the murder of multiple young girls in the country”. What? No, how had they found out? He’s always been so careful o drag the bodies off to the woods were no one would look. An officer grabbed his arm and put him in hand cuffs. His search for the perfect peanut loving girl was almost complete, it wasn’t fair. He stared out at the horrified face of the reporter as the police car pulled away. Damn he thought, so close.